I can’t get past the old

Old friendships

Ex-relationships

Past family tiffs

Old conversations still linger in my brain,

spreading nostalgic lips into a smile.

Old arguments shake my core,

leaving wallowed anger.

Memories are all they are

but their reminiscences

triggers

old emotions, bottled emotions, new and untouched emotions.

I remember the boy who first broke my heart

shattered even the broken pieces

the pain of the shards

piercing my chest

still lingers

I remember the harsh red eyes of my father

insulting my being

sullying my soul

I remember the first girl I dubbed best-friend

sweet words to my face

daggers into my back

I remember second chances and ignorant happiness

lyrics to every melody

taking back I love you’s in fear of the reactions

I prefer remembrance over numbness

prefer memoirs of my past

Letting go of the past, can’t heal my heart or heal my mind

good or bad, they are mine.